Saturday sweet talk.

How nice is this to get on a Saturday night in your inbox?!

"Your first photo is so beautiful....a lovely serene face ( look at that perfect nose!) and something beautiful in that tattoo on the shoulder.  I am wowed ! Question: Do u do the face paintings yourself ?

very impressive miss. I am no expert but i realised that tattooes which have flowing lines coming out of them look beautiful on women. They are delicate and elegant. Like the tattoo on your shoulder. Goes well with your (gorgeous) looks...good choice! "

Why thank you. This msg lifted my spirits. Put a smile on my dial * as some might say*



I know this song is a few years old but I love it non the less. Especially now....

You feel it????

Frustrated

I am a control person, right. Nothing wrong with that. It means I get things done. And fast. There is nothing more frustrating to me than a person that is unable to make a decision or act on what to me is clear as water. Being a bludger.  If it effects me I get annoyed and in some cases it infuriates me. That people don't have the ability to get things done is beyond me. Then they might as well stay where their at and rot. If you don't do anything to try to change yourself or the situation you are in then DON'T COMPLAIN.

It turns out I will only have Razmus this weekend. Having a wanker to reason and agree with is not the easiest. I can't believe the adults can act like children. SIGH!!

Raz and I had a really nice Friday night. And today I have finally gotten him to cut his hair.
So now he actually look presentable.

 

 

 

 

 

So Saturday cozy night it's only me, Razmus and After earth. Ice cream and fruit.

I'm pretty tired today. More tired than usual because I had an overseas chat again. If nothing magically happens, It looks like I will have a house guest. And a possible trip to London to see a football game.
Which is good. I need something to look forward to and be positive about right now.

Wish you all a great weekend.....

I'm making chili chicken, salad and brown rice for dinner. YUMMO!!!

FRIDAY!!

Had a terrible sleep last night. Tossing and turning with a millions thoughts.

It's sunny today and I'm sure it's pretty cold too. I'm sitting on my couch with my doona and chatting with people. Applying for jobs and searching for schools for the boys.
After the parent meeting last night I flipped out. Had a "meeting" with the boys' dad after and something's need to change. Had a good talk and we actually agreed to change certain things.

If I didn't feel so bad I would turn the school upside down. I just don't have the energy atm. Hopefully it will pass or go away soon. I'm over this.

I had a job interview too. And OH MY DAMN!! I really hope I get that job hey. I think I would do a real good job. Not only is it cooking, it's also supervising others and teach them to cook. Sound challenging and you know I love a good challenge. Fingers crossed everyone!!

Besides if I get the job I could get my own flat near the boys and it would make my life soooo much more easy and I'd be happier too. I have so many ideas on how to fix the flat up.
Unfortunately it's a very expensive area so I hope I can afford a 2 bedroom flat. If I'm really lucky I can get a 3 bedroom flat. But then it probably would be rundown.

Since I'm not very good at renovating I don't wanna buy a fixer upper. Then again I do know a builder/Carpenter who wants to come stay for a while. So work for a place to crash?? Sounds fair right!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh boy...this was a night to remember. Whop whoop

I did find the most exotic things when I came to work sometimes....

 

Epiphany

Sitting on my couch on a Thursday morning drinking my Rooibos tea and watching Dr.Phil can be a life changing experience. Really. That man has some fucking talent.

He addressed a topic that is very close to my heart atm. And it just hit me. Like that.
And this epiphany will make my meeting today so much easier.

 Stop justifying your inactivity and avoiding the challenge of change.....


And do what you say you're gonna do. Otherwise it's just empty words that don't mean shit.

Sometimes you have to make the right decision, and sometimes you have to make the decision right.

Awareness without action is worthless.

 

Take it from a guy: If you're in love with somebody, you will swim the stream, you will climb the mountain, you will slay the dragon. You're going to get to her somehow, some way.

 

Hard times

I have been thinking a lot about my dad lately. And about others that have lost loved ones too soon.

If I would die too soon I hope you would find some consolation with this beautiful song.
That I will be by your side until you feel better......

                                                        Enjoy Tynnereds finest

Im leaving on a jetplane...

I don't know when I'll be back again....

Seriously peeps. How friggin hard can it be??

                                                          Adam....you are a house god!!!

May time pass quickly

Got bullied into joining a community today. I was reluctant at first. I never really got the meaning of those sites but oh my damn I had fun tonight. Within minutes I had so many msgs. I talked to a selected few. Got asked out on dates by very good looking men . But as it happens I'm expecting company or if opportunity presents itself earlier I'm heading to warmer lands again. Call it holiday, retreat, karma or just correcting past mistakes.

 This song is also a reminder....

Maybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano



Have an appointment tomorrow so I need to shut down my laptop and end my overseas conversation.
I still have problems with the time difference. 8.5 hours to Queensland.
Have mercy!!!

All about.....

 

 

How great is this cover version??

 

 

If she's amazing, she won't be easy. If she's easy, she won't be amazing.
If she's worth it, you wont give up. If you give up, you're not worthy. ...
Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

When we’re hurting and struggling to feel good about ourselves, the way we tell it, our blanket reason for why something has or hasn’t happened, pretty much boils down to rejection. We make it about our worth, whether we’re ‘good enough’, what we think we did or didn’t do, and likely analyze the shit out of the other party. When we were hopeful, feeling great or even crazy about them, there were two of us and now that it’s all gone pear shaped, it is solely about us even when it’s about him/her/the situation.
We can feel rejected because:

• We experienced disappointment including things not going in whatever way we’d hope that they would.
• A person wouldn’t change for us.
• A person wasn’t what we assumed him/her to be.
• We misjudged a situation.
• We didn’t hear what we wanted to hear.
• We were or felt criticized.
• Our decision was respected.
• Our feelings weren’t reciprocated.
• We got into a conflict or sensed that if we didn’t take ‘protective measures’ such as people pleasing or distancing ourselves, that we would experience it.
• We felt unaccepted and disapproved of.

Here’s the thing…
Everyone has some level of fear of rejection. Everyone.

 
It's been difficult to write about my relationships and my thoughts regarding them for quite sometime lately. My inability to do so wasn't so much so that I had some sort of writer's block. It's actually quite the opposite. I actually have so much to say or so much on my mind regarding my past relationships as a whole. I've been boggled down with my own personal feelings on the matter that, I have not been able to funnel through it. I just can't seem to make sense of it all, or where to begin. Partly being, is that I'm learning to emotionally let go. Holding on to a certain something or someone has been one of my biggest issues. Letting go of what had been my drug, my emotional addiction. It was one of the hardest things I had to do and like with any addiction every new day is an entirely new struggle. Holding on too long has been a downfall of mine.

I honestly have to say that there are truly many depths of love. You can love people for totally different reasons. However, when love is staring you in the face you truly know it without a doubt. Love makes you want to give even when there is nothing to gain in return. At the same time love can sting when it's not returned in equal or even a remote measure. While love can be so beautiful it can be equally dismal.  

When it comes to attraction, surely there is an abundance of eye candy to satisfy ones satiable cravings if need. However, how rare is it to come across the "ONE" that actually moves you?
I'm not just talking about lust here. I'm talking about the kind of person that speaks to your inner spirit, at least that is what I thought. Trust me, it takes a special/unique person to reach or tap that inner abyss. That inner abyss, that I call my inner spirit might have been off, hallucinating or something because I really thought I was picking up on some serious vibes.

 

 

In actuality I was not.

I was just running full speed on my emotions. Well, thank goodness for friends who know you well and can help you reality check yourself from time to time when your sensors are completely off. Anyways, after sharing my situation with two of my closest girls, I got instant clarity and had the biggest epiphany! Everything that was being exchanged was one sided. There is no mystery here in trying to figure out which side it was that was doing the most exchanges.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wow....got some thoughts out and sorry if it came across as negative. I'm bouncing back to being my old positive self. I didn't get the nickname sunshine for nothing.

 

LUQAS

Yesterday was my amazing son Luqas' birthday.
Time flies by so fast. It feels like I was changing his nappies not long ago.
Children really are a blessing. I'm so happy and proud of mine.

We started off the morning by singing to him as usual. ( the only difference was that their dad wasn´t present ) He got 2 presents and then we had breakfast.
Made pancakes and whatnot.

For additional birthday present we went to Liseberg. I haven been this year for obvious reasons so I was looking forward to it. The weather was nice. Cold but sunny. Although I saw heaps of people that wore shorts, skirts and t-shirts only. Idiots!!

Got them all-day ride passes. Expensive as but the boys were really excited and happy.
Joacim came along so we made it a family-ish kinda day. It was actually real nice. We all had a very good time. I was afraid that I couldn't go on some rides but I could, or I did it anyway. I loooove going on rides.

 

 

 

 

After Liseberg I took the boys home to mine and we decided to have tacos. I haven't had tacos I over 2 years. Took a walk to the grocery store and got what was needed.
Can't believe I'm eating meat again. Well...small steps. Not meat every day yet.

We pigged out. Well not Luqas. He strangely came down with something late last night. He got a very high fever within 30 min of being fine and then he vomited. He was under a doona beside me all night on the couch shivering poor thing. Then after he'd thrown up he fell asleep. And so did Razmus. So I ended up sitting by myself watching the rest of "Helen of Troy". Yay!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you so much to everyone that wished Luqas a happy birthday on way or the other.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUQAS. I LOVE YOU VERY VERY MUCH.....