Horror and beach....

Yesterday I was at war with my kids. It got so bad that I had to separate them and send them to different rooms. For a looong time. Didn´t feel good at all. But there as to be consequenses for their actions. So hopefully it won´t be an issue today.

Went to Sussy´s house. She just move last weekend to a great house. I don´t understand where they find all them fucking great houses they have lived in?! And for good rent too. Hey, you guys. You need to hook a girl up!! She saw I was sad so she gave me Swedish Marabou chocolate and nougat. Close to an orgasm...thanx babe!!

Finally got my Bankbox thingy back. I need that to get the tickets back to Sweden. It was a hassle, let me tell you. But now it´s done and I haven´t felt so bad in a long time. I really super hate it that I´m forced to go. However if things go as I hope....... J

Jody is back. YEY!!!!! Missed her and the kids. Me mate is back from OZ. Had dinner with her and the kids at SC. Updated her on the latest ( hmmmm). No drinks! That´s a flamin´first

Had Indian food which was beautiful. I love Indian food. 160 Baht was a bit overpriced for nanbread and yellow rice though. But I was hungry.

Razmus continued being naughty so i had to take them home. *sigh* but I can´t have him acting up and not do anything about it. Got home, put Razmus to bed and got the tickets.

Put Luqas to bed as well and waited until they fell asleep. Went out for a drink. I needed that.

Since it was Katarina´s birthday (a russian girl I have gotten to know) I stopped by SC for a quick drink and to say happy birthday. Sam was there so I stayed a bit longer than I though. Always a pleasure talking to him. He is def one of the people I´m gonna miss heaps. But I might go to Melbourne so I can go visit him and the offspring ;)

Went to Papa´s after to have a chat with Rade about my birthdayparty tomorrow. It is gonna be off the hook. Kamalas best party in history!! Wanna come?? Just show up J

“Everyone” was there so I stayed and chatted for a while. Then some of my friends wanted to go to BROOMSTICKS ( a bar up the street) so i tagged along. Had a really good time, as always with these guys, but when it was close to midnight Adam and I decided to go back to my house and watch horrorflicks. Mohahahaha.....

I am not allowed to show any of the other pictures I took from Broomsticks. (You are one crazy lady, but you are the best anyway)

As you know I love horror movies, I´m just to big of a wuss to watch by myself.

And like last time I sat with a pillow grabbing his arm if it was too scary. A movie about puppets and a crazy lady that wanted to become one and killed through herv dolls. Corny, I know but it had its scary parts. Sorry Adam for the jumps but hey....no scratches this time. That was an improvment right ;)

Looked at californication e1 too. So now I´m gonna have to start watching that too. Damn good series. Fucking hate series....takes up all your time. Except TRUE BLOOD. I love that series. *sticking to it like glue not matter what anyone else says*

I ended up going to bed at 04.30 this morning. And waking up at 08.45. Then the power went. They are doing some work on the lines or something. So at 16.20 we got the power back.

But I hit the beach with the kids and Angelo. So nice to see him I have missed him so much. Still on one crutch after the car accident 1,5 months ago. My sweet Angelito.

The boys had so much fun. I know my kids has missed playing with him so it was heart warming to see. So Luqas is spending the night at Angelos. That gives me time to do something speciall with Razmus. Just him and me. :) That´s gonna be nice.

Break it off boy (immediate if not before)
Cuz ya got me feelin naughty
I wanna know boy
If I could be ya shawty (pumba)
Set if off boy
And make me hot all ova my body
Break it off boy

I´m only human.....

Have you ever been in a situation where you just feel so helpless? When you just want to scream and cry? That´s how I feel now for so many reasons. I´m panicing inside and I don´t wanna show it. I have to keep strong and stay positive - that´s the person I am. Positive.

However even I can fall and I just need someone to pick me up. Normally I do it my self, just dust myself off and try again. But defeat is not an option for me. Never has been.

I am so disapointed in so many people. Backstabbed and betrayed in ways I never thought was possible. I would not do it to them.
Had a really great heart to heart conversation the other day with my friend Sam. He said some good stuff to me and it made me feel heaps better and see things differently. Trying so hard to not let stuff get to me.
Thank you my duckie. So happy to have you in my life.....

I´m not gonna bore you with my shit any longer......

Next post will be brighter and more cheerful.
´cause I got some positive things in my life right now, which I am really greatful for. If I hadn´t had that it would be fucking hard.

 Light in the tunnel??? Let´s hope so :)

Weekend

This weekend has been insane.

Thursday was poledancing night at my local spot, SC, as every Thursday.( you should come by and have a dance and if you are lucky someone might wanna have a lapdance ;) )

Bella wanted to see me so I met her first at Oh lala. Didn´t sit for long until Nong Sao started texing and asking for me. What can a Pee Sao do other than come support the Nong Sao so she could dance :) All good!

Was in a very good mood, my friends was happy to see me and I got lots of hugs. I like that :)
Had a few glases of wine and danced almost all night.

Friday we had dinner at Kamalas best restaurant Papa´s (in short). Had dinner with Bella. We talked about my trip to Samui and about life in general. Bella is from the same town as me and we have the same sense of humor. Gothenburg people are like no other :) After the last guests had left Marcus, the chef, put on music and we sang and danced. It was hilarious. Luqas was at SC talking to Jim. Jim was Luqas´ teacher. Went back to SC after papa´s for some wine. The wine is cheap there and that suits me just perfect right now. Didn´t stay long just for a quick chat and drink.

Had a looong talk to my partner in crime. She is truly my oldest and closest friend. Told her everything that has been going down here. It felt like I just lifted the world of my shoulders, she gives great advice and is very frank. I need someone that is honest and straight up.... Love you honeybun.
Saturday was pissing away. It rained so much I couldn´t bring myself to do anything. Around lunch time went to Bella´s. She needed help with facebook and putting in pictures. She gave the kids swedish candy. Me being reluctant giving them any candy said yes. Christmas comes twice this year.....
Hung out at Bella´s for a few hours and then I had to go home. It was Hayley´s birthday and we were going bangla. Actually had to take a tuk-tuk to Patong because of the rain. Shared with Angela and Hayley.
Angela is house sitting for a Swedish family in Kalim. When I walked through them doors I was stunned. My jaw droped like it was hot and I just said HOT DAMN!!
What a house. I totally understand why Angela wants to stay in all day and night. Not even a house...a castle :) Spend most of the short time on skype. Couldn´t even do my hair so it had to be pig tails...again.

Had dinner in patong with Angela, David, Hayley and Tina. Poor David, stuck with us girls :)
After dinner we went to Kenta at soi Eric ( a must visit if you are in Bangla)
 Had some shots ( the swedish shots are the best) and some drinks before we went to Whiteroom. Always great to go there. Love the boys and they always get so happy to see me. Doesn´t hurt to be called beautiful either :) ( my nickname at WR)

Danced or tried to anyway. So croweded and a guy spilled his drink on my arm. Grrrr!!
We dance crazy so we need space. And to be honest the guys there were a bit too touchy. I don´t like to be touched or feeling someone breath on my neck by strangers. If they are not cute that is ;) hahaha..

Met the Irish couple I sat next to from Surat Thani. Sweet! They came with us to the bar where we can look at Johns and their "girlsfriends" going in and out. That place has swing-doors. :) We cheered everytime the exited or entered. Some had the shitts and some looked proud. How you can be proud of fucking a bargirl, that is so nasty and most likely she has an STD, is beyond me. But then again many men that comes here and lives here comes for the Thai experiance. Makes me wanna puke by the thought of it. To be fair...some are skankier than others.

Went up to Seduction for some dancing. Was good fun until hmmmm how shall I put this....middle eastern gentlemen wanted to dance. Then we called it a night. David ended up staying at his bar by the brothel. Ahhhh....love is wonderful!

Slept so good in that bed with a proper duvet and ac on. All that was missing was snoozing....

Woke up in the morning feeling like P.Diddy....

Took a tuk-tuk back home in pouring rain. Spent the day just chillin and getting some soulsoothing.

Thank you my super amazing friends for a great weekend.

I´m doing me!